the questions of life

The most frequent question I've been asked lately is “how's married life?”.. now really how does one answer that kinda question? umm.. wonderful, great, I love my hubby but I've got more chores..? they all fit but they are only a speck of what married life is to me. Is there even a prudent way to go into details, or to express the deep enjoyment I find in spending every day with my best friend. But more importantly, how much do people really want to hear when they ask that kind of question? Quite often a simple “good” suffices and we move on our merry way. Life is funny like that, we all seem to know the right questions to ask one another.. but do we know how to answer and receive them? Somehow I don't think we really do.

Anyway so the other day I was at work joining together large pieces of paper to make a giant butterfly for the toddlers to paint, and the lady in the kitchen asked me that question “How's married life?” A lovely lady, and I answered the best I could (I think I'm getting a bit better at answering as people are giving me so many chances to practice). Sadly the conversation that followed didn't last very long (we came to an awkward point and never recovered), but it did however get me thinking...

And as i pondered the question, I re-realised that I've gone through a lot of rather significant phases this year. But what's more, is that each stage is summed up by the most frequent question people were asking me at the time:

1- “How was your trip?”
2- “How did he propose?”
(and if a girl asked, the first question was often followed by “show me the ring”)
3- “Are you staying for good?”
4- “How's wedding planning going?”
5- “When does he get here?”
6- “How was the wedding and honeymoon?”
*and now finally the current favourite*
7- “How's married life?”

I wonder how long it will take before question #7 phases out? I kinda get the impression that this is a question people only ask newlyweds. I've never ever heard anyone ask my parents that question. I get the feeling that there's some invisible line that Carter and I are approaching where people will seemingly begin to care less about our married life and thus stop asking. Please don't get me wrong I don't believe that friends and family cease to love or be interested.. rather I think it's just that we don't know what 'new' question to ask.

Thankfully for most, God created the wonder of children. So whenever it is that Carter and I begin expecting our own bundle of joy I'm sure this new and exciting question will arise... “When are you due?” Life is full of funny quirks, and in no way do I despise questions or the repetition of such, it's just amusing how they manage to sum up all the significant moments of our existence.

Personally I can't wait for people to ask me when I'm due. What a wonderful stage of life that will be. My oldest sister gave birth to a beautiful little girl earlier on in the year, and now I can't imagine the world without Charlotte. So I can't even begin to comprehend what it will be like when it's our turn.

I'm loving every moment I experience with Carter right now and I'm so excited about all the steps that lie ahead of us. What questions are people yet to ask us? I honestly have no idea, but what I do know is that I'll try to do all I can to enjoy every moment between them and now. After all it's not just the pieces of a puzzle that make it beautiful.. it's how they all fit together. So although our lives can be summed up in questions, it's really the answers and the in-between moments that define us.

And now speaking of such in-between moments I think I'm going to leave the computer for a while and sit next to Carter as he's on the couch strumming away on his guitar. Maybe we'll read some more of the book we're in the middle of...? who knows. :-) I'm just happy to have another day where I can enjoy being a Bandy.
xxx